Where “I’ll try” begins
Okay, I’m going to tell you something I don’t admit to many people. I’m a Nintendo junkie.
I love wandering around Hyrule, exploring caves, and fighting monsters. I could easily lose hours in a game, so I have to be careful about my screen time.
But it turns out, my guilty pleasure has become one of the best ways I connect with my students.
They love to give me gaming advice, ask how far I’ve gotten, and commiserate with me when my young granddaughters erase all my progress (yes, it happens). What started as a hobby has become a natural way to build relationships with my middle schoolers.
And over time, I’ve realized something important:
For older struggling readers, connection often comes before effort.
Before a student is willing to take a risk or push past “I can’t,” they need to feel safe. They need to feel known. They need to trust the person asking them to try.
Find Low-stakes Ways to Connect
There is no one-size-fits-all teacher persona. The key is to be yourself and let students get to know you.
My students know I’m a little “geeky,” love horses and gardening, and enjoy a good pun. They hear stories about my granddaughters and their adventures. In return, they start to share about their own lives.
These moments don’t take long—just a quick conversation before class or a few minutes of “good news.” That kind of familiarity doesn’t diminish your authority, but it does lower student anxiety.
Give Authentic Praise
Many struggling readers expect to fail.
Nothing shuts down effort faster than hearing “good job” when a student doesn’t believe they’ve done one.
Instead, focus on what they actually did:
- “I saw you chunk that passage.”
- “You stuck with that longer today.”
When students hear specific, honest feedback, they begin to trust it—and they become more willing to keep trying.
Create Safe Entry Points
When a task feels too big, many struggling readers won’t start.
A safe entry point lowers the risk just enough for a student to think, Maybe I can try this.
That might mean:
- offering a shorter passage
- previewing key vocabulary together
- starting with a brief discussion
Sometimes it’s as simple as offering a choice:
“Do you want to read this with me or try it on your own first?”
The goal isn’t to make the work easier—it’s to make it approachable.
Be Consistent and Predictable
For students who struggle, unpredictability increases anxiety.
Consistency builds trust.
When routines and expectations are steady, students begin to relax. They know what to expect. They know how you’ll respond when they’re stuck. They know they won’t be put on the spot or left to fail publicly.
Even your language matters. Phrases like, “Let’s figure this out together,” or “Show me what you tried,” remind students they’re not alone.
Over time, that predictability creates safety—and safety makes risk possible.
Conclusion
For students like Luke (see previous post), the shift from “I can’t” to “I’ll try” doesn’t happen all at once. It’s built over time through consistent, intentional relationships.
It’s about showing students that you see them, that they’re safe to take risks, and that you’re not going anywhere when the work gets hard.
Because for many struggling readers, effort doesn’t come first—trust does.
And once that trust is in place, “I can’t” starts to loosen its grip… and “I’ll try” finally has a chance to take hold.
In my next post, I’ll share some of the specific ways I lower the barrier to reading so students feel safe enough to take that first step.